I read your teachings, especially the “90 Days Challenge”, with great interest. I am a scientist working abroad. I have a girlfriend of three years who I love very very very much. However, we have communication issues and I always feel like she needs more of me than I have to offer. My problem is that I give so much to my work. Because I work (predominantly with animals) they demand more of my attention and love than other people have to give in other jobs. I am really at the end of my tether because when I come home (she’s unemployed by the way) she’s just sitting there surrounded by empty packets of biscuits demanding satisfaction. When I suggest that she takes up a hobby, she just growls and rolls over.

I understand that you don’t want to hear excuses – and I am ready to throw myself into providing her with the greatest 90 days of her life. But where can I begin? I asked her to make a list of the top ten things she needs to feel loved and she just laughed and then went to sleep. She won’t come with me even to the supermarket.

Your methods seem to be innovative and unique. Can you give me any advice?